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An Open Letter to my Frenemies

July 6, 2010

Dear Neiman Marcus, Saks, Barneys, Bloomingdales, Nordstrom, Bergdorf Goodman, and the like;

Stop sending me e-mails with pictures of shoes on them! With every *ding* from my inbox,  my resolve not to buy shoes for the rest of July wobbles.

I would love to buy these Alexandre Birman shoes from you, Neiman Marcus.  I WANT them, sure… but I simply don’t have $725 to spend on platform gold python cutout pumps.

Damnit Saks, get out of my brain! You know I dream of dozens of Jimmy Choo heels dancing around me while I chase my favorites. As soon as I get $1,095 for Foxy Suede Open-Toe Ankle Boots, I promise you’ll be the first to know.

Oh, great. Thanks to Barneys, now I not only have to come up with the $$$ for Celine Pre-Fall shoes, but I also need to spend $300 on a plane ticket to NYC, since the collection is available in-store only and I refuse to go to any store besides the original. THANKS A LOT!

Not all is lost. I just read this e-mail from Saks.

Ewwww. I am so disgusted that I don’t want to shop for shoes right now. So the drug of choice is also the cure. Go figure.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. July 6, 2010 5:40 pm

    The studded peep toe dolce vita isn’t bad…
    but seriously, the emails are truly relentless. reminding you to buy stuff you know you don’t need.

  2. July 6, 2010 8:21 pm

    Thanks Cher. Your post just made my day!

  3. July 6, 2010 8:43 pm

    As soon as you figure out how to cure this disease, let me know. How about three pairs in the last week? I. Feel. Your. Pain.

    ♥ V

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